Last Entry Here it is, my last entry. These random notes have run longer than planned. The initial purpose of… Read more real time with jacob

My Apology Why do I apologize so much, especially for my behaviour, my thoughts? Guilt. Shame. Fear of rejection. I… Read more real time with jacob

After the Thoughts It’s been a week and my engagement with the thoughts of death has pretty much stayed the… Read more real time with jacob

In Need of a Reboot Feeling suicidal lately, which is never a good sign. I get these moments of simply… Read more real time with jacob

Rollercoaster After rereading some of my entries, I write myself as being on a rollercoaster. One moment, I’m stable, collected,… Read more real time with jacob

Hair Dilemma I started to hate my hair today. It got long over the few months and I simply started… Read more real time with jacob

Stress in the Pit of my Stomach The physical symptoms of stress can cause havoc and it happens more often… Read more real time with jacob

Communication Part 2 or I Lost Count Telling your spouse that you want to hurt yourself or end your life… Read more real time with jacob

The Trouble With Language A lump, a blimp, a blip, all sound the same to me today. Not just sound,… Read more real time with jacob

Asking About a Trigger Can Be a Trigger Yes, it’s a thing. Asking someone about their trigger is like asking… Read more real time with jacob

Homework Sample: Continuing Towards Wellness Here is a sample of homework from my final week of the CTB program (week… Read more real time with jacob

Communication How to talk to the therapist? My approach is being straight up. They are still human after all and… Read more real time with jacob

Connecting with the Ethereal I know there is a bit of skepticism but I’m trying something new here. The connection… Read more real time with jacob

Diet Building on last week’s entry, but diet has been much impactful in my recovery. Surprisingly, people think well pop… Read more real time with jacob

Bonus Notes Just as I thought we were starting to be through the pandemic and I can finally start to… Read more real time with jacob

Worry It’s all about worry, worry, worry. Why do I worry? How do I worry? What type of worry do… Read more real time with jacob

Self Harm One of many topics I don’t like to write about but to reflect and learn, I must face… Read more real time with jacob

Pandemic, Media, and Mental Health It took a while but I finally got to the subject. I’m echoing here, but… Read more real time with jacob

Soothing Vibrations I might be a man nearing my forties but to this day I still therapy rock as a… Read more real time with jacob

What’s New With The Blog I don’t like advertising or promoting anything really but I have embarked on a challenge.… Read more real time with jacob

After Therapy Ends One good thing about online therapy, you can go back to the notes of your session. Re-read… Read more real time with jacob

Not an Educator By no means am I an educator. If anything I am the opposite of an educator. I… Read more real time with jacob

Wellbeing It’s raining pills in my room, well, not really, but I feel like it’s raining pills in my room.… Read more real time with jacob

No-Entry Entry 2 Happy New Year! 🎇